Thursday, April 22, 2010

"I Hope There's No GUN in the House!"

Scene One: Saturday, shortly after three a.m. and only a few minutes after Vickie Wickie received her phone call from the Foxster, as shown in our previous post. Vickie calls Milo Fenderbender at his home.

Vickie: Milo?

Milo (sounding groggy): Of course. Why are you calling at this time of... (hopefully, after a pause) Not feeling... lonely, are you?

Vickie: Get real. (brief pause) Are you alone?

Milo: Of course I'm... I mean, why do you ask?

Vickie: Is Tara with you, by any chance?

Milo: No! Why?

Vickie: I just got a pathetic call from the equally-pathetic Foxster. Tara never went home after work. (brief pause) Were you at Kewl Beanz! tonight?

Milo: For a bit, yeah. (pause) She was still there when I left. No idea what's going on, though, sorry.

Vickie: I tried to convince him to rifle her contacts on her cell phone... which the little bimbo left at the bar. I almost feel sorry for whoever she did end up with when he finds them!

Milo (after a long pause): Ohhhhh, boy. I hope he doesn't show up here.

Vickie: Why would he show up at your place? And does he even know where you live?

Milo: No, but he could find out easily enough. (pause) If he took your advice, I'm betting he saw my name on her contacts list.

Vickie: Really.

Milo: Yeah. I got hold of her private number -- via my usual connections, you know -- and called her yesterday afternoon! But when I called, she was a bit... frosty. (imitating Tara's voice mockingly) "Nothing personal, Milo, but if ever you want to call me again, I'd appreciate it if you reach me on the bar phone... or call the Simpson/Lynch Studios number."

Vickie: Well, whenever she does get her trampy little ass home, I hope there's no gun in the house! Ol' Foxy was really pissed off! (pause) Go back to bed, Milo. (Vickie disconnects.)

* * * * *

Scene Two: "The Old Fenneman Estate," current home of the Foxster and his girlfriend, Tara King. It is approximately 4:30 that same morning.

Tara enters the house through the living room door. A small light is suddenly turned on by the Foxster, who has been sitting in the dark since shortly after waking up from a nightmare. He is holding a half-empty glass of milk, Tara notices.

Foxster (calmly): Where have you been?

Tara (surprised): Ohmigods, David! You almost scared me to death!

Foxster: We're even, then. I tried calling you, first...

Tara: Sorry. I don't have my cell phone. I don't know where I left it...

Foxster (continuing): I called Kewl Beanz!, and then I actually went there. I called Bella. I called Vickie.

Tara: Vickie? (sarcastically) Oh, nice.

Foxster: Don't you dare try to twist this around! (pause) I even called the hospital!

Tara: You called the... (pause) Why?

Foxster (standing): I had visions of you being in a horrible accident in the BMW I bought for you only last week! (pause) Where have you been?

Tara remains silent as the Foxster enters the kitchen and turns on the light. He uncaps his new bottle of Valium -- as prescribed by Dr. Jane Kildeer -- and takes two, washing them down with the glass of milk which he still holds. Finally, Tara speaks.

Tara: I... I had someplace to go.

Foxster (with an edge in his voice): No kidding, Tara! You're purposely being evasive, and I won't play that game. Where the hell were you?

Tara: Please, David, trust me on this one. I can't tell you. You have to respect that, okay?

Foxster (shouting, as he angrily throws the empty glass of milk into the sink, where it shatters): Are you kidding?!? "Trust" and "respect" aren't even in my vocabulary right now! (pause) You were with... him... weren't you?

Tara (nervously): "Him?" (pause) Wh-who do you mean?

Foxster: You know damned well who I mean! Milo!

Tara: Milo? Milo?!?

Foxster: Who else?

Tara: What the hell makes you think I was with Milo?

The Foxster removes Tara's cell phone from the pocket of his pajama shirt and holds it up, somewhat dramatically.

Foxster : You left this at the bar. (pause) And against my better judgment... I checked your contacts list.

Tara (exploding): You did what?!? I don't believe this! Where the hell did you get an idea like that? (The Foxster says nothing, not wanting to mention Vickie again.) How dare you?!?

Foxster (re-entering the living room): Well, excuse me for being worried! And maybe I'll apologize... after I hear your explanation!

Tara: You can shove your "explanation," Foxster! (brief pause) Gimme that cell phone! I am so outta here!

Foxster: I think I'll keep it... since I'm paying for it!

Tara: Fine! You can have your stupid cell phone! Maybe you can give it to the next set of pretty legs you fall for!

Foxster: Fine! Maybe I will!

Tara: And don't worry, I'll have the BMW delivered to you after I get... wherever I'm going!

Without another word, Tara exits, slamming the door behind her and departing for... parts unknown.

Trembling with rage, the Foxster attempts to control his breathing. He turns on his rare, unrestored Philco radio as he passes it on his way back to the kitchen, letting it warm up as he gets himself another glass of milk to wash down another Valium.

The Foxster returns after taking his third tranquilizer. WPLJ-AM, the local Pleasantview oldies station, is playing "Love Hurts" by Roy Orbison. The Foxster is all-too-briefly soothed by Orbison's voice... until he recognizes the song, whereupon he screams an unintelligible exclamation of anguish and viciously kicks the radio over onto its side. Tubes shatter and sparks fly as the valuable antique breathes its last.

The radio is silent now... as is the Foxster. After several minutes of listening to the pounding in his chest, he walks back into the kitchen, empties his bottle of Valium into his hand, and stands at the sink, staring at them...

* * * * *

To Be Continued Concluded!

Next: Things get even WORSE in the final chapter!!! We DARE you to read "VICKIE, VICTORIOUS!!!"


  1. What a hot scene...both Foxster and Tara are off the charts. Please don't end this with the Foxster taking all those pills!

  2. Foxster, I know Tara would never do anyhing to screw up your relationship. Take a deep breath, calm down and if your thinking of those pills, dump them down the sink.